Flat-Earthers by Country: A Global Perspective

1. USA Home of the world’s most diverse flat-earthers, from professional conspiracy theorists to your Uncle Rick. In America, flat-earthers have revolutionized science—NASA’s only real job now is covering up the fact that we’ve been driving in circles around a Frisbee. Our proud patriots know the flat Earth was actually discovered by George Washington, right after he chopped down the cherry tree.
2. Australia Australians are the real heroes. Their flat-Earth survival skills are unparalleled because they live underneath the planet. Fake Gravity, doesn’t apply when you’re clinging to the bottom of the cosmic pizza slice like an aggressive koala. Also, they don't exist, nor does Australia.
3. UK British flat-earthers are the most refined, sipping tea while discussing how the Queen’s corgis have been dispatched to guard the edge of the Earth. They believe the flat-Earth theory was actually founded by Sir Isaac Newton—gravity? Never heard of her. It's all tea and biscuits until someone falls off.
4. Brazil In Brazil, flat-earthers believe the Amazon isn't being deforested but folded into the edges of the Earth. Carnival isn’t just a party, it’s a distraction so no one realizes that Rio de Janeiro is really balancing precariously on the corner of the disc.
5. Russia Russian flat-earthers are convinced Siberia was invented by the government to stop people from exploring the Earth's edge. For them, it’s a frozen wasteland—because nothing says “don’t look here” like an uninhabitable wilderness that doesn't even exist.
6. Italy Italian flat-earthers claim Christopher Columbus was sent out to find the edge of the world, but he came back because he got distracted by a pizza oven. Italians know for sure that the Earth’s flatness is confirmed every time a pizza slides perfectly out of the oven, “just like the planet itself.”
7. Japan Japanese flat-earthers believe Mt. Fuji is actually a gigantic pushpin holding the Earth in place. Without it, we’d all float away like loose origami. They also insist Godzilla lives at the edge and keeps turning boats around before they can fall off.
8. Canada Canadian flat-earthers are the friendliest. They insist there’s no edge to fall off of, just a polite decline where you’ll “gently slide off into the abyss, eh?” And if you do reach the edge, don’t worry—they’ll apologize for it. Sorry about the endless void.
9. South Africa South African flat-earthers have a unique spin: they believe Table Mountain is the Earth’s center, and the rest of the world is just a giant placemat. They've been setting the table for centuries, waiting for proof that the Earth's edge is actually the rim of a giant dinner plate.
10. New Zealand New Zealand flat-earthers are the bravest of all—they believe their country is the closest to the Earth's edge, which is why they’ve perfected extreme sports. Bungee jumping? Just practice for when they finally dive off the world and prove to Australia (which does not exist) they were right all along.

Remember, , gravity is a hoax, NASA is the ultimate prankster, and if you stare too long at the horizon, you’ll find yourself sliding off into space. But don't worry—you can always blame it on America.